Motherhood: Episode 2 Sahitya Diary

Motherhood: Episode 2

Sahitya Diary

Mom asked me a question while taking another mouthful of rice, and I stared blankly at her.

"Poison, Mom… what happens if someone eats poison?"

"Nothing happens, dear…"

"Let me have some too. You give it to me every day, so why not today?"

"No, dear. Don’t even come near me."

I could sense how heavy Mom’s voice had become, how difficult it was for her to breathe. I didn’t know what to do.

"Mom, what’s wrong? Why are you acting like this?"

"Can you get me some water, dear?"

Mom began speaking in a strained, halting voice. I handed her my glass. She tried to reach for it, but she didn’t have the strength. I held the glass to her lips, and she gulped it all down at once. Then she collapsed onto the floor. I had never seen Mom like this before, and I was terrified.

"Oh, Mom, are you in that much pain? Why are you doing this to yourself?"

Mom pulled me close and began speaking in a weak voice.

"If you can, forgive me, dear. I have done you a great wrong. Tell Allah to forgive me too."

Seeing Mom in such a pitiful state, I couldn't hold back any longer. I screamed, my voice echoing through the house. A moment later, Marzina Fupu and her brother from the neighboring house rushed in.

"Akaid, what happened? Why are you screaming? Did your mom hurt you?"

"Marzina Fupu, something’s wrong with Mom… I’m really scared. Is she going to be okay?"

Marzina Fupu and her brother rushed toward Mom. They whispered something I couldn’t understand. I just stared blankly. After a while, Marzina Fupu’s brother said to me—

"Akaid, we have to take your mom to the hospital, or she won’t survive."

"Ah, death… You’re saying that in front of the child? Be quiet," Marzina Fupu scolded her brother.

More people gathered at the house. Ismail Chacha from next door arrived with his van. Everyone helped lift Mom into the vehicle. I ran after them.

"Oh, Ismail Chacha, Mom isn’t talking. Will she be okay if we take her to the hospital?"

"Yes, son. She’ll be fine. Now tell me, where is the money in the house? We don’t have much."

"Money? I have some…"

I ran inside and grabbed the few notes Mom had given me yesterday, along with some coins my father had left behind. I ran back to the van.

"Here, Ismail Chacha, take this money. Will this be enough?"

Ismail Chacha stared at me for a moment.

"Oh, my dear boy, what will this little money do? Your mother will need a lot more."

"But where will I get that much? I don’t have it."

Marzina Fupu’s brother suddenly appeared and said to Ismail Chacha, "Don’t waste time. I’ll arrange the money. Let’s go."

Mom’s lifeless body was lying in the van. I was seated near her head, holding her hand tightly so I wouldn’t fall out. After half an hour, we arrived at the hospital. Mom was taken inside. I was brought back home. I pleaded to stay at the hospital, but no one listened.

---

At night, I sat outside, staring at the sky. I had received no news about Mom. Only one phrase kept echoing in my mind: *"Forgive me, dear… I have done you a great wrong."*

What did Mom mean by that? Why was she asking for my forgiveness? Only Allah and Mom knew. I couldn't understand the mystery. Suddenly, someone placed a hand on my shoulder. I turned with a start.

"Dad, is that you?"

"Yes, it’s me."

"You haven’t told anyone, have you?"

"Told them what?"

"That I was the one who gave you the poison… you didn’t tell anyone?"

"No… but what would happen if I did?"

"Exactly. You mustn’t tell anyone. Promise?"

"Okay… now take me to Mom. I want to see her."

"It’s too late now. I’ll bring her back tomorrow morning."

"Really? You’ll bring her then?"

"Yes, now go to sleep."

I went to my room, feeling relieved. Morning came, and I woke up anxious, wondering when Dad would bring Mom home. Soon, I heard the sound of a vehicle and people approaching. I ran outside to see them unloading something wrapped in plastic. I asked Dad:

"Dad, what is this? Where’s Mom? Mom, where is she?"

"Son, your Mom is in this plastic," Dad said, crying.

"Why are you keeping Mom in that thick paper? She can’t breathe!"

Hearing this, some of the people began to cry. I didn’t understand what was happening. Dad held me tightly, sobbing.

"Your Mom is no more, son. She has left us all behind."

Hearing Dad’s words, my head spun. Darkness seemed to close in around me. I fell at Mom’s feet. Suddenly, I noticed something strange—these were not Mom’s feet! Why were her toes so long? I was certain this wasn't Mom’s body. Then why was Dad calling this Mom? Could she really be alive…?

"No, this is not my Mom! Dad, this isn’t her!"

"Oh, son, grief has clouded your mind. You can’t recognize your own mother."

The villagers tried to reason with me, but I knew this wasn’t Mom. I had to correct Dad’s mistake.

"Dad, they’re calling me crazy. Show them Mom’s face! This isn’t her!"

"Son, this is your mother. Accept what has happened."

They insisted on finishing the funeral rites. To this day, I stare at her grave, imagining if I could lie there with Mom and feel no pain.

---

A few days later, Dad started staying home more. During dinner one night, he hesitated before speaking.

"Akaid, I need to tell you something."

"What is it, Dad?"

"Since your Mom is gone, you can’t live alone… so, for your sake…"

"For my sake, Dad?"

"I might bring a new mother for you. Would you be upset?"

Hearing this, I put my food down.

"Why a new mother? She’s not my Mom. Please, Dad, bring my own Mom back."

"That’s not possible, son. But the new mother will love you just as much as your Mom did. Soon, you’ll forget all about this."

"I don’t want a new mother. I will never forget my Mom."

I poured water into my rice bowl and left the room. Dad called after me—

"I only said it for your own good."

I ignored him and went to my room, closing the door. This was the room I had shared with Mom. Her pillow was still where it always was. Her scent lingered on her sari. Only the person was gone. Being in this room made my heart ache. Mom had shared countless stories here—fairy tales, tales of queens and kings. I had demanded so many things from her, and she had fulfilled them all. She had scolded me and wiped away my tears. Thinking of these things, I drifted off to sleep.

Suddenly, a noise woke me. It came from outside the room. I went to the door.

A woman was sitting there, her face covered with a veil. I asked—

"Who… who are you?"

She didn’t respond. I slowly approached and lifted the veil. A strange feeling washed over me… it felt like a dream.

"Mom? Is that you? Where did you come from?"

**To be continued…**